Funny Voicemail Messages

Some of my favorites from this web site:

Twinkle, twinkle little star,
bet you're wondering where we are,
Well, put your mouth up to the phone,
And leave us a message for when we get home.
And if you can make your message rhyme,
We'll call you back in half the time!!!

Hi. This is John.
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

Can't take your call, I'm hiding from the men in white coats. We've been playing hide 'n' seek for weeks, and they still haven't found me! Tee Hee Hee! Leave a message?

You are growing tired. Your eyelids are getting heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number and a message. BEEP!